Good morning? I think so. -

I said a few days ago that I have been in somewhat of a funk. Mike and I went for a walk last night and talked about it. He offered all kinds of great solutions to help me out of it. Don’t you just hate when they are right about everything? Anyway, we talked a lot about perspective and yada yada like that. So, I just want to tell you a little bit about my morning, with a new perspective.

Ellen and I decided to get up at 6 o’clock this morning. You know, just for fun. I had decided that I was going to get up at 5 so that I could shower and get ready before the beast was awake. But, I decided against that after Mike, Ellen and I had a little party from 1:30-4am. It was a blast. Let me tell you.

So, 6 am rolls around and we’re nursing, we’re chatting, we’re pointing to the ipad yelling, “Elmo?” No, actually just Ellen was doing that.

We got out of bed so we could get on with our day, and like most people, I like to make a stop in the restroom first. Ellen did not like this idea. She insisted on sitting on my lap. And, if you have children, you probably have no idea what this is like at all, right?

So, on to breakfast. Ellen decided to pull all of the books off the shelves while I made a breakfast of oatmeal, yogurt, fruit, cheerios and soy milk. Put one in the win column for this good mom. We sat down on the floor to eat because fighting the high chair battle wasn’t in the cards this morning. Then, I turned on the Today Show (and retracting my good mom point). Ellen alternated between wanting what I was giving her, “Moy? Peese?” (more, please?) and schizophrenically deciding it was not for her, “Nononononono no no no Niiiiiice!” (+ finger wagging and head shaking).

Ok, breakfast accomplished and time to change the poopy diaper she produced while eating. Classy. But, first, we need to pretend to change her stuffed kitty’s (aka “mow”) diaper. Ellen will consider sitting still to get her diaper changed if we do the kitty’s first and then pretend the kitty is changing her diaper, and not me. Why not me? Why, I don’t know. We do what works, people. This her her doll, not kitty, I know.

It’s 9am and I would enjoy a shower. But wait, Ellen wants “boo-beeeees!” I tell her they are for night night, so she tells me she wants night night. Ok, she’s rubbing her eyes and yawning. I believe this. Boo-beeeeees it is. I nurse her and then…LIAR! She is up! She is awake! She wants to play. But she has already played – she played me.

Fine. Shower time. Ellen and I go into the bathroom so I can get ready. Here is what happens while I am in the shower: Ellen watches me shower. She pulls all of the toilet paper off of the roll. She figures out the cabinet lock and pulls all of the trash out of the can. She throws the trash in the shower with me. She finds other objects to throw in the shower: a comb, a brush, face wash, exfoliating cream – each followed by “uh-oh!” She bangs on the (thankfully!) locked toilet. She watches me shower some more. I get out of the shower as Ellen points out all of my body parts she is interested in and take her into the bedroom so I can be not naked.

Sidenote: Why don’t I just put her in her crib while I shower? Because she screams. And there is only so much screaming I can handle. Right now it is only reserved for naps and the middle of the night. And besides, what else am I going to do while in the shower? Shave my legs? Relax? Ha! No.

I get dressed while Ellen pulls my clothes out of my drawers, pulls all of the books off my nightstand, finds a pen to brandish around, pulls on electric cords to a mommy chorus of “dangerous!”, and one-by-one brings items from the bedroom into the bathroom.

I am finally dressed (and notice I did not say I put on make up, did my hair or brushed my teeth yet? Those are luxuries for later.), and Ellen seems to want to take a nap. Do I believe her? I want to. So badly. So we try.

We rock. We sing. We pray. She yawns. She rubs her eyes. She fusses. 30 minutes later I decide to just lay her down. Blood curdling screams. Mike and I call this the pre-rock. We put her in her crib awake and then go back and try again in 10 minutes. She must like the alternative to being left alone because the second time around she starts to fall asleep. I lay her in her crib. She gives one last swan song, and almost 1.5 hours later, she is asleep! Woo hoo!

And now, I have some time to myself. So, what do I do with it? I sit here and relive the entire morning by typing it out for you. Lucky you. Sick me.

So, what is the point of all of this? Why did I delight you with the comings and goings of our typical rock-star morning? Because last week I would have been crying all day. I would have wanted to curl into a ball and sleep. I wouldn’t have wanted to do anything all day but wallow.

Does that ever happen to you? I believe that is called a funk, no? But today I am pulling myself out of it. I am looking at the events of the morning and laughing – being thankful even. Thankful that I get to stay home. Laughing because, come on, this kid is insane.

I love my life at home with Ellen – even if some days I get a little funky. And she’s up. Gotta go.

Update: Ellen is playing with her picnic basket. But, this is after we had lunch and I had to dunk her. Turns out she is randomly scared of bathing again today. So, on went my suit and in I bathed. Insane I tell you.

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Good morning? I think so.

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