Aye yay yay, people. Ellen turned another month older today; she is four months old! Four months ago we brought home our itty bitty gal. I am continually amazed at how much she has changed from those first few days. So, here are few things Ellen has been up to:

This girl LOLs like crazy now. She likes when you snuggle your face in her belly and make raspberry noises. She also really likes to be tickled!

Ellen is super interested in her toys this month. Like last month, she still loves her Sassy letters. She even fell asleep holding them the other day. She also loves finger puppets and her book Melissa the Monkey. We’re pretty sure she has a crush on Melissa’s friend, Manny. Every time he comes up in the book, she squeaks and coos and waves her hands like crazy.

Ellen is also very good at taking her pacifier out of her mouth, and she can usually get it back in on her own. But, her favorite thing to suck on these days is her thumb. She shoves her whole hand in her mouth and then searches for her thumb. When she finds it, the rest of the fingers come out and away she goes.

Our gal also lost a lot of hair this month. She no longer has Mike’s perfectly horizontal hairline. It’s receding on both sides and lightening up quite a bit. Her hair loves to stick straight up into a little mohawk. Adorbs.

This month we have been struggling more than ever with Ellen in the car. When she was first born, she loved the car. It put her right to sleep. Now, we can’t go anywhere if it is after dark. We aren’t sure why this is happening. I took her to the doctor, and he was stumped too. It’s not acid reflux. We tried driving with the light on in the car. We sing to her. I sit in the backseat. Blanket on. Blanket off. Give her a little snack. Burp her. White noise. We’ve tried it all. Our best guess is that babies are just fussier at night, and it is exacerbated by being in the car. We’re praying she outgrows this soon as nights are falling earlier and earlier these days.

Despite this minor issue, Ellen has been such a wonderful baby this month. She is all smiles all day. She loves to stand and loves to look at her Daddy. She wiggles and squeaks whenever he comes home from work. She isn’t sleeping through the night yet, but we are getting there. And, she is gaining weight like a champ!

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What does a day look like in Ellen’s life? Let’s take a look:

7am-ish
Wake up for a morning feeding

7:30-9am-ish
Snuggle with mommy in bed

9am-11am-ish
Watch the news, play with my toys, eat and take a nap

11am-ish
Mommy takes a shower and gets ready. She sings the whole time to keep me entertained. Then she cleans me up and changes my clothes.

12pm-ish
Mommy and I run errands or clean the apartment. Mommy also works on her blog and jewelry making while I nap or eat.

4pm-ish
Mommy makes dinner while I am in my carrier

5pm-ish
Mommy watches Ellen with me. I like her name.

6pm-ish
Daddy comes home and I smile at him. Daddy eats dinner while Mommy watches because I always get hungry right when she puts dinner on the table.

7-11pm-ish
Mommy and Daddy take turns playing with me while the other one “gets some stuff done” 
11pm-ish 

Daddy rocks me to sleep and then Mommy and Daddy crawl into bed with me

In reality, our days are just a mish-mash of events that sound like this. I am trying to get out of the house at least once a day, even if it’s just to walk around Target (and not buying anything! GASP!) Here is the list of things I make sure I do each day if nothing else:

And, “ish” is really the operative word in our day. Ellen is on her own EASY schedule. Eat, Activity, Sleep, You (mommy) Time. It’s always that cycle, just in different time increments. It makes it easier to predict what she is going to want next, just not when she’ll want it. One step at a time!

Animal Flashcards

Plush fruits and veggies

Sophie the Giraffe

Crib mirror

Sassy Alphabet Links

Target

Bible Study

Meijer

Secretary of State

Doctor

Joanns

“Do You Know the Way to San Jose?”

“Itsy Bitsy Spider”

“ABCs”

“I Am Slowly Going Crazy”

“Five Little Angels”

“Skinamarinkydinkydink”

“Going to the Zoo”

“Shake My Sillies Out”

“I Love You a Bushel and a Peck”

Books We Read (This is forever changing. We love to read!)

Susan Boynton Books

CAT by Van Fleet

What are some of your favorite activities/songs/books for your children? Let me know in the comment section below.

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Ellen turned three months this past Saturday. This is a big milestone for her, but also for me. In my mind, three months really signified having a baby rather than a newborn. It’s a whole new set of clothing. It’s when big changes really start to happen. When you ask a doctor when a baby should do this or grow out of that, the answer is always “Around three months.” So, what has my baby been up to this past month?

We took Ellen to a festival sponsored by our church. We met a friend of Mike’s up there for a beer and some baked goods. Unfortunately, we had to leave early because those church people like their music turned up loud! I feel like this is something else I never thought about before having a baby: I go to a lot of really loud places. Not really suitable for a baby. I just put my fingers over her ears and she snoozed away though; the doctor said as long as she didn’t seem bothered then it was fine. Good to know.

We also chose a couple of vaccinations for Ellen. I did a lot of research into these and picked some that I thought were important. We opted out of the Hep B and flu shot, but we went for Wooping Cough, DTap, Roto and Polio. Our doctor buys the vaccines separately to avoid any additives that are controversial. I had to have my mom come with me (Mike was working) to the appointment for moral support. The nurse was SO FAST, like Jimmy Johns fast, and I am so glad she was. Ellen looked at me right after the shot, and I thought she looked ok. Then, the most blood-curdling scream came out of her and I lost it. Then my mom lost it. Three sobbing girls in the doctor’s office. What a sight.

Mike and I also had a milestone this month: we had our first night out without Ellen. I pumped way too many bottles, and we left her with Mike’s mom. My parents took us out to a Tigers playoff game, and I didn’t do all that bad.

 

 

Ellen also met her cousin Emma and had a play date with her other cousins Emma and Lucy.

 

We took Ellen to her first cider mill.

And Ellen laughed for the first time! And she is so so so so so so smiley. I can’t even stand it. When you look at her and talk, she gets so excited and just smiles and babbles and melts our hearts. You’ve never heard a sweeter sound!

She is reaching for her toys and toes.

And Ellen went to her first MSU tailgate. She got to hang out with her Uncle Joe, Aunt Sis and Uncle John. And, MSU beat Michigan 28-14 – their 4th year in a row beating those darn Wolverines! Go Green!

Finally, we took Ellen to her first Adoration. She was sleeping when we got there, but it was such a special moment for us that I woke her up, took her out of her car seat and snuggled with her.

 

Oh my baby is growing up. She has the cutest voice and uses it all the time. She loves blowing raspberries and smiles so big when her daddy comes home from work. Next month I imagine I will be writing about more instances of laughing and Ellen rolling over. She has her legs going from side to side, but hasn’t mastered the shoulders yet. I may even have to write about teeth – the doctor told us all the drool means teething! Yikes!

Ellen month-by-month (I was a little preoccupied the first month trying to recover from pushing a baby out of my body.)

OK, this post keeps getting longer. I just keep finding new, adorable media containing my baby!

It seemed so simple before I had Ellen: I would breastfeed. Duh. You have a baby, latch her on, and that’s it, right? No one ever told me there was a learning curve. I mean, it’s what we’re supposed to do, right? How could there be a learning curve? After having Ellen and struggling and wanting to give up, I’m so grateful that I had the support of my husband, mom, doula, and nurses to help me get through the difficulties. For those of you who aren’t familiar, let me school you.

No one tells you that there is an art to latching on a baby, and in my case, Ellen needed some training. If you don’t get this right, baby gets fussy and mommy gets hurt.

No one tells you that they have a veracious appetite in the beginning in order to establish your supply. My advice: cancel your plans, grab some snacks and the remote and camp out on the couch for a few days/weeks until things settle down.

No one tells you how awkward it can be to feed your baby in public. I don’t mind; I really don’t. But, sometimes people think it is weird or obscene that you would ever dare to feed your child in their presence. Grow some thick skin and smile at those people when they pass by.

No one tells you how helpful it would be to buy a shield and pump some bottles to give yourself a break. My doula mentioned it to me one night when I was at my wit’s end, and it was a lifesaver. Keep those ideas in the back of your head for if you ever run into a stumbling block.

No one tells you there is about 1 million issues that can occur and need to be trouble-shooted (did I make that word up?). Find a good lactation consultant, go in and have her observe you feeding your baby. Take her advice. If that doesn’t work. Repeat.

 

This list is exhaustive and growing each and everyday, but here are some small things I am missing right now: going to the bathroom alone, running out of the house to pick up something “real quick,” finishing cooking dinner (or any task, really) without having to stop and feed a baby, leaving the house for an indefinite amount of time because no one needs you to survive, sleeping through the night (duh), finding time to shower before noon most days.

Even though I have a long list of things I miss, there are so many more things that I have gained. Such as…

 

Yes. It’s true that everyone tells you that you will never know a love like the love you have for your child. I was totally prepared to be in awe of my new capacity to love, but I wasn’t prepared for how it would actually feel. It is filled with tears of joy, pride, cheek squishing, content sighs, worries about the future and total bliss. I love thinking about the fact that my mom loves me just as much as I love Ellen. Pretty cool. Thanks, Mom!

I will say this though: please don’t feel guilty if your first thought after giving birth isn’t total love for the being you just met. My first thoughts: “I’m not pregnant anymore!”, “Whoa, that was insane!”, “Did that just happen?”, “Am I ok?” I think that’s pretty normal.

 

OK, this is another one that is pretty obvious, but you just don’t think about it until you have a baby. At home, Ellen cries when she needs something and poops really loudly. The first few times I took her out in public, she did these things, and I my first thought was “Geez! We’re in public!” But, then I quickly realized that she doesn’t care or even know where we are. She just needs to be cared for. And, frankly, most people don’t care if you have to change your baby on a bench because there is no bathroom in sight.

Leading up to Ellen’s birth, I was home alone quite a bit. I had left my job so I could stay at home with her, and there was quite a bit of time until she arrived. During this time, I would go out and about or call people during the day, but most of the time, I was by myself and not talking (because I am not crazy). I had lots of time to think and be by myself, and I really love my alone time.

With a baby in the picture, you’re talking ALL.DAY.LONG. Anytime she is awake, she is with me and I am talking to her. I am sure this habit will increase as she starts to grow older and can talk herself. But, for now, I am so tired of talking by the end of the day, I can barely ask Mike how his day was.

 

 

This is another one that you hear many times before having a baby, but you don’t really understand it until you have your own. You start experiencing situations that you have NO IDEA how to handle, so you call people who you believe to be all-knowing, only to find that they have no clue either. You can talk it out together and come to your best guess, but no one really knows what they are doing. Parenting is a big ol’ guessing game, turns out. But, I am learning that the one thing you must do is make all decisions confidently and with your child’s best interest at heart. If it doesn’t turn out, you can’t have regrets if you did what you thought was best.

 

Don’t worry. She didn’t fall; I should have said Autumn. I apologize for that. Anyway, here are some photos of Ellen’s first trip to the cider mill this past Saturday. I am still learning a lot about this camera, but I have seen a dramatic improvement in my pictures, and I am excited to learn more!

Here are a few of the scenery. A little noisy, but the colors looks great. Speaking of colors, I TOTALLY forgot to take pictures of the gorgeous leaves on the way there. I was too caught up ooohing and ahhing at them.

You weren’t allowed to pick apples at this cider mill. Apparently, “For every apple you pick, three apples fall to the ground and go bad. That is just bad business.” I didn’t know that. Ok then…

We wanted to do the corn maze, but no one told us you had to buy tickets at the front. We were too far into our adventure to go back. It was at this point we started to really laugh because we kept failing at cider mill activities. Trust me though, it was a wonderful day to stroll and take pictures with family. No fun lost!

 

After Ellen woke up, we took some pictures of her as well. A couple are out of focus and a bit overexposed (don’t you love how smart I sound…), but she is so darn cute, who really cares? Here’s Ellen picking out her first pumpkin. We got her an itty bitty one, and it only cost us $0.30!

This one is a bit fuzzy, but it’s so cute. She wanted to peek around on the hayride despite the blazing hot sun!

 Ellen was Mrs. Grumpy Pants for most of the day. Here is a shot of her being a crab apple. Still cute though!

Then, we headed out to Ann Arbor to stroll around and get lunch. We stopped in a little park area to change her diaper, and she was totally loving the sun and breeze. We decided to take advantage of her happy mood and took some pictures while we taught her about the leaves.

Mike actually took this one after I taught him what I had learned in class. He’s a fast learner. Ellen was cooing up a storm here. Adorbs, I know.

Oh My Gosh! That’s my baby. My pretty, pretty baby!

Finally, we headed home. I subscribe to a blog, Digital Photography School (this will be relevant…) that has a weekly photography challenge with tutorials. This week it was taking photos at the “Golden Hour”, so I did one last shoot while the light was right. I don’t think I did half bad. Here is daddy with his girl.

 

Have you been to a cider mill yet this year? What’s your favorite part about them? Tell me in the comment section below.

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Baby Girl is two months old today. Has it really been two months since I was screaming “Give me a c-section!” in the delivery room as I was pushing her out? Memories.

What has Ellen been up to in her first two months out of the womb? Well, let me tell you.

Ellen has been growing like a weed. She doesn’t have a ton of chunk yet, but home girl is LONG. Like, really, really long. How did I end up with a long baby? I am too short for that.

She also is smiling, cooing (my favorite!) and drooling. I am so glad I have too many bibs!

My little monkey also has discovered her hands. She loves staring at them among other things: the white wall in our living room, the birds behind our bed, our bedroom window, and surprisingly, the TV. If we watch a movie at night, she is always craning her neck to see what’s on TV. We don’t let her watch TV, but she tries to sneak it. Defiant baby.

Ellen also recognizes our voices and follows us across the room (with her eyes…she’s not THAT advanced).

She is wearing 3 month clothing now that she is in cloth diapers. I didn’t want to put her in 3 months just yet, because technically she still fits in newborn and I am in denial that she is growing, but she has so much junk in her trunk now with her cloth diapers that she just doesn’t fit. Whatever. Her butt is still adorable.

I love the fact that she enjoys being set down for alone time now. I put her on her play mat next to some toys and she just coos away. Sometimes she even fusses to be put down. My little independent woman.

Finally, big props to Ellen for sleeping from 11:00pm until 4:30am almost every night. It’s a lot of work learning to do everything she did this month! I wish I could say I had something to do with this, but quite frankly, I don’t care how it happened. Just, thank you.

Ellen has been quite a few places and does well when we’re out. She goes back and forth to Metro-Detroit, goes to JoAnn Fabrics, grocery shopping, church, Ann Arbor, the mall, the doctor, and other places. 

I have a confession though, I have yet to make it out of the house with Ellen by myself. I have been out of the house alone (pump a bottle, Mike babysits), and I have been many places with her and Mike or my mom, but not just me and her. Honestly, I could, I am just nervous. It takes so much energy to get her ready and myself ready, and when we’re out, there is so much to juggle: car seat, stroller, diaper bag, carrier, my purse, shopping bags, etc. I don’t know how I will ever do it alone! I know what I need to do. I need to plan ahead the night before. Make our first few trips out alone small ones. Take it slow. Now I just need to do it.

How long was it before you felt comfortable taking your first born out alone?

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Ellen is so hip.

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Update: When I transferred to WordPress, the pictures did not come too. Fear not, they are on our main computer, but I haven’t been motivated enough to transfer them. Maybe after we have two I’ll have more time…

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My little squeaky monkey was two weeks and three days old yesterday. It was also Mike’s first day back at work. Selfish. Her and I spent the day trying to figure out what our routine is going to look like. More on that later though…like after I figure it out.

 

Today, I wanted to talk a little bit about labor and delivery for you birth story junkies. As the title of my post suggests, it took me a while to wrap my head around the whole process, and even as I write this, I am still in disbelief that I did that. I am anxiously awaiting my trophy that I am sure is in the mail.

 

So, here is our story:

 

Mike and I were in bed around 10pm the night I went into labor. Earlier that day, I had written my eviction notice, and I assumed that it had not worked. All of a sudden, I heard this loud popping sound that came from my pelvic area. I looked at Mike and said, “Did you hear that? I think my pelvis just cracked!” I wasn’t in any pain, so I didn’t think anything of it until I got up for one of my many nightly bathroom trips. “What is with all of this water?” I thought to myself. Duh, Jenna. I’m assuming you have figured out by now that my water had broke, but being a first time mom, I didn’t get it just then.

 

I started to feel some cramping at that point, and only then did the idea of labor cross my mind. I texted my doula, Vicki, who confirmed what we thought. She told me I would probably go into active labor within the next day or so. Little did we know what the next 22 hours would hold.

 

Yup. 22 hours.

 

Around midnight, the contractions were coming consistently at three minutes apart. We called the doctor who told us to get in right away as we were supposed to be at the hospital at five minutes apart. Rookies. Mike and I headed to the hospital where Vicki was meeting us. I sat in the back seat hugging the head rest unable to get into a comfortable position which is weird considering how pleasant and relaxed I felt…

 

This is all sounding familiar to you moms, isn’t it?

 

I was admitted into labor and delivery where they checked to make sure I was actually in labor. I let them know that if I wasn’t in labor I was, in fact, dying and they should just admit me anyway. Turns out it was labor, but I had not dilated at all.

 

Now let me say, all the time I have known Mike, he has never seen me get sick before. I just don’t puke. I don’t know why. That all changed the night I went into labor. I never knew I could throw up so much. It kind of went like this: ouch, ouch, puke. ouch, ouch, puke. ouch, ouch, puke.

 

I was all set for this labor stuff with my detailed birth plan and request for no epidural. 14 hours into labor, I was only one centimeter, and I was having terrible back labor. I opted for the pain meds to get my body to relax enough to dilate, and let me tell you, modern medicine works wonders, and seven hours later, I was ready to push. With the next one, I plan on having Mike give me the epidural before we head to the hospital. Can we do that? OTC epidurals?

Before pushing, I decided to hit my epidural button to get a bit more relief. It didn’t seem to be working, but I just chalked it up to the fact that it was getting time to push, so it must be more intense. After an hour of pushing, I could hear my baby Ellen cry, and then the nurse told me to hold her in. What?! Seriously? She was right there. Like, right there. And I had to hold her for five minutes while Slowsky McDoctor shuffled down the hall?? Finally, I looked at the nurse and said, “I’m not waiting” and Ellen was born! Liability shmiability. When the doctor and other nurses came in, they noticed a big pool of water on the floor next to me. Apparently my epidural had fallen out and I was actually going without one. The placebo effect is very powerful.

 

Now, most people say they immediately forget the labor process and are just thrilled to see their baby. That’s, like, half correct for me. I was thrilled to see Ellen finally, don’t get me wrong, but I don’t forget those things very easily. We’re hoping it will be a few years until Ellen has someone to call brother or sister. I did however experience an overwhelming sense of love. I had no idea that I was capable of loving anything or anyone as much as I love her. That is the best!

 

Now this may all sound like a big woe-is-me fest. Let me assure you: it’s not. To be honest, I am so very proud of myself. I discovered how strong I really am. I had no idea I was capable of something like that, and it has given me a new perspective and new confidence. When we left the hospital, I actually mourned the end of the labor and hospital experience. I loved that time (ahem, after it was done) because it created such a special bond between me, my husband and our daughter. I wish I could relive the moment she was born every single day (like, the actual moment she popped out, not the rest). Now, she is growing and changing every day, and all I have of the experience is memories (and a few choice pictures that will remain within the confines of Hines eyes), but I love each day with her at home even more and more. Aw.