Muddahood Archives - Page 2 of 3 -

Free Online Lent Conference for Women #CC4Moms

February 2, 2015 By Jenna 2 Comments

Want an easy way to set aside time this Lent to prayerfully look at your vocation as a mother and woman? The Catholic Conference 4 Moms is a perfect and FREE way to listen to simple, useful talks/podcasts from other Catholic moms on topics that will help you grow in this season of preparation.

Who:

The Catholic Conference 4 Moms Speaker Lineup

What:

Every day during the conference, you will have access to 5-6 talks (titles of presentations here), just as if you were at a live conference. This link will come via email. What’s different is that you can choose which talks you want to watch or listen to and when you you want to do it.

When:

Friday, March 6 – Monday, March 9. After the conference is over, it will all be available for purchase for one low price of $39.99. This will include online access to all the videos, as well as a download of every video presentation. And besides all of this, there will also be bonus downloads, PDFs, discussion questions, ebooks, and other goodies.

Where:

At your computer. Whenever you want.

Why:

Because we could all use a fresh new look at our lives as women and moms. Lent is such a beautiful time for this. Read more about it here.

Now What?

What should you do next? How do you sign up? Follow these steps to ensure the best experience:

Register for Free Here
Enter to win a prize pack here
Like on Facebook
Follow on Twitter
Follow on Pinterest
Watch the Promo Video

I’m most excited to hear the following talks:

Why is it hard to be a mother today?
Praying with Children
5 Daily Habits that Will Help You Get Out and Stay Out of Survival Mode

Do you plan on attending with me? What are you most excited to hear?

7 Tips for Taking a Pregnant Selfie

January 18, 2015 By Jenna 12 Comments

Looking thin while pregnant should probably be your very last priority, because, um, you’re not. I’m not. We’re not. Dere’s a baby in dere. BUT, I know the vain woes of wanting to look your best and just fit into your clothes again, damnit!

So, when you’re putting your bumpdate out there for the world to see, it feels good to look a teensy bit nice instead of feeling like an orca. I get that. We deserve a little self-confidence, and I don’t care if that is a sign of a broken society. Break on.

I stalk a lot of your preggie selfies, take notes and have come up with a little system that makes me feel good about putting my bellah out there for y’all to see. I swear to you I’m bigger in real life, but you’d never know it. Or the hormones are making me delusional.

Good Posture: Standing up nice and straight does wonders for anyone. You should just do this all the time. I’m talking to me.

Keep Hips Back: Just a touch. No need to booty pop. But, keeping the larger part of yourself further from the camera makes it look a tad smaller.

Suck It In: Again, just a bit. You are pregnant after all. There isn’t any hiding it and nor should you. It’s beautiful!

Hand on Your Back: Press a hand into the small of your back so that there is no extra fabric creating extra you in the behind area.

Tighter Shirts: I’m not talking second skin. Just wear something flattering and not a mumu.

Filters: Smoke and mirrors. Black and white if ya need it.

Remove Visual Clutter: Clean up the background to create a cleaner looking picture. Keep the focus on your beautiful belly, and remember, you’re pregnant. NOT FAT. I only say this because I need to hear it too.

Do you have any hot tips for me? I’m all about feeling my best while pregnant.

Jumping on the Potty Wagon: The Un-Method

September 16, 2014 By Jenna 5 Comments

This is a sponsie, but truth be told, I am in love with Pull Ups, and we use them each and every blessed night. This article is sponsored by Pull-Ups® Full disclosure: this article is financially supported by Pull-Ups® Thanks to Pull-Ups® for sponsoring today’s discussion

Do you know I actually drive a potty wagon? I cart dat froggy around for convenience, my friends. And, while we are all on the topic, I’d love to give you my unsolicited advice on what worked for us. And by “worked” I mean she still occasionally forgets to pull down her pants when she sits on the toilet. But first, a few words about my style de parenting:

I like to wait until the very last minute or until my kid is way past ready to try anything. Why? Because then it’s not a struggle. And we all know in motherhood, the struggle is real. On top of waaaaaaaaiting it out, I love the easiest option that requires me to do pretty much nothing at all. That works for me. Maybe not you. But, we all have different thresholds for “doing stuff,” right? Now,

I can’t take total credit for this “method” we use. Annie is the genius behind it’s main tenants; I just heeded her advice. She’s my mama mentor. Wax on, wax off, Annie.

Steps:

1. Prepare: wake up one morning and decide that since you’re not doing much that week, let’s give it a go!

2. Put underwear on your kid.

3. Never yell. Have them help clean up. Bribe. Sit them on the potty a lot.

4. Eventually they will get sick of peeing on themselves.

5. If they don’t, try again in a few months.

6. At night, put on the Pull Ups, baby. Worry about night training in a very long time.

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• Solutions for nighttime
• Potty training on the go
• The best clothing for potty training

Get your own Linqia sponsored content here. (affiliate)

Cat’s Out of the Bag

June 16, 2014 By Jenna 46 Comments

Or baby is in the uterus. Or something.

So, I had this adorable little announcement to impress you guys with, but turns out that y’all are super sleuths and figured this one out on your own. (I guess when you take your youngest to a BBQ in a Big Brother shirt to tell your family, you should also plan to have pictures of said event posted on Facebook. My bad!) So, what the heck? Ta daaaaaa! I couldn’t keep it from you much longer anyway ;)

EDD 2.18.15

We’re just about five weeks along, so it’s super duper new.
Your prayers would be awesome.

New Moms: You Don’t Have Big Kids

April 28, 2014 By Jenna 23 Comments

Simcha says you will one day be able to leave the big kids home with the littles while you run errands.

Kendra doesn’t know how to shower with just her littles underfoot.

The lady down the street from me says that little kids aren’t outside a lot because they are too little to do it on their own.

So, stop comparing yourself to moms who have big kids.

We have littles. Our babies can’t do the things big kids do, so we can’t do the things those moms do.

They say this is the hardest part for a reason. It’s full of diapers and trying and failing to get out of the house and not being able to shower and feeling trapped inside and wishing just one kid could buckle themselves and being responsible for every single need for every single person in the house.

This isn’t to discourage you. It’s to remind you (and ME!) that this is normal. This is hard. This is ok.

What makes it discouraging is when you compare yourself to moms with big kids.

We have littles and its hard. But were doing it. So we rock.

The Best Laid Plans Up In Hur.

January 28, 2014 By Jenna 16 Comments

chat chat Let’s have a chat. Buckle up because it’s going to be a rambly ride.

That Norovirus must have knocked a little bit of sense into me. Weird because I didn’t think I had anything left inside of me after that. Now you know…

A few weeks back I wasn’t feeling like the best mom out der. I wallowed. You listened. And now I’m back to give you more. This one is better though, I promise?

The only reason I have for this clarity of thought is that the stomach flu from HELL must have cleansed my brain of all fog along with 10 pounds I didn’t know I had to give.

But my healthy mind decided something:

Maybe it’s not that I’m a crappy mom. Maybe it’s that I have anxiety. And instead of feeling sorry for myself, I can do something about it. So, I’m going to start right here by rambling about it to you…

This is where it gets foggy again.

Before I had kids, and before I got into an (minorrrr) accident (maybe I should write about that one day?), I didn’t have anxiety like this. I wanted to be a personal trainer and nutritionist. I worked out. I used to be a gym rat, you guys. Would you believe it? I hit the gym 7.days.a.week. I had arm and leg days. Who was I??? I trained for a marathon. I felt good. I want to go back there-ish.

And, because I am a listmaker, list-make I must. I decided on 10 things that would make me feel more of who I feel that I am: the person I was before kids, except this time, WITH kids. Do you know what I’m trying to say? Should I have scrapped this post the first time I tried? The list. Right:

Eat Well
Exercise
Take a Probiotic
Reduce Sugar Intake
Use Essential Oils More
Replace Anxious Habits
Go to Chiro
Take a Blood Booster
Stop Yelling
Daily Prayer

I have plans for these things. Big plans. Plans with all kinds of details that I will certainly follow through on. But, I don’t want to steal all of the spotlight with my grand and foolproof plans. No no.

Instead, why don’t you load me up with all of the motivation and advice and products I need. That would certainly be helpful, you know, if I didn’t already have big plans…

So, it’s not just me?

January 5, 2014 By Jenna 7 Comments

You guys.

I had a moment on Friday, and all of y’all came back at me like gangbusters with so much love and advice and support and “me too!” The comments and the texts and the phone calls and the emails and the messages and everything. You filled me right to the brim.

I read each and every one of your comments and loved every single one. So much wisdom and great advice from seasoned mommas, moms who are right in the trenches with me, nannies and even some stay-at-home-dads.

So, what now?

Now, I just need a new plan. I need to sit back and read all of the wonderful support one more time. I need to process all of that love and integrate it into my daily grind. And, I am pumped to do it. You lifted me up on eagle’s wings – or something like that.

You made me realize that this was a bad day/week/whatever and not a bad life. I am in a funk; I am not a bad mom. I can change things tomorrow. Things are going to get easier. This is hard (I need that validation – a lot). And everyone feels this way sometimes.

You reminded me that I do love staying at home. I love my kids and care for them. And, because of all of this, it’s ok to hate playing. It’s ok to want time for me. And, it is certainly ok to take it. As long as my kids feel love, it’s going to be alright.

Do I think that part of this might be PPD? No. I thought about it. I talked to Mike about it (that guy KNOWS me). And, we both don’t think that is the case. While some of my thoughts and feelings might align with PPD, they aren’t constant. There is still an overarching sense of contentment with my vocation as a SAHM. And, while sometimes I lose sight of why I do this and why I chose it, I still have hope that things can be and will be better.

Anyway, I just want to reach out my virtual arms and give ya a big squeeze for being so generous with your prayers, advice and solidarity. And, if you are feeling the same way as me, or you’re a mom-to-be or have another one on the way, don’t let me freak you out. Let me just be real with you: some things get harder and make you want to run away. But, some things get a whole lot easier too. You’ll up. You’ll down. You’ll make it. I’m gonna make it too.

And, if they really drive me that crazy, I can always do this:

http://awkwardfamilyphotos.com/category/photos/the-kids/page/12/

Muah!

Warning: This is a real downer. But I could use your help.

January 3, 2014 By Jenna 51 Comments

Can I preface this by saying that this is not an attempt to fill my combox with lots of “Don’t worry. You’re such a good mom” type comments? This is a post where I just want to get real about the inside of my mom brain for a few minutes, and any advice you can throw my way to help me out is welcome and appreciated. Just be honest and nice, ok? I want to be a better mom.

I know we are all in the trenches, and I know it is supposed to be hard, but is it supposed to feel like THIS?

I know we are all in the trenches; I know it is supposed to be hard, but is it supposed to feel like THIS? Other moms say it’s draining, but I’m worried I’m messing things up big time.

Lately it feels like I spend the majority of my day in a constant emotional loop that looks something like this:

Reluctant Responsibility:

If you have kids, you know that the minute they wake up, they need you. Every little thing needs to be done for them for the most part. I wake all through the night just so I can wake for the day and a really stupid hour and start my day elbow deep in pee and poop. Then clothes need to be changed. Teeth brushed. Hair brushed. Baths given perhaps. Let’s not even talk about Sam’s naps. 45 minutes to get this kid down for all four of his daily naps. That’s almost four hours of rocking a fussy baby to sleep each day, you guys. And, obviously, these needs go on throughout the day. Never ending, right?

Why does it feel like such a dreaded chore? Shouldn’t I be able to realize that this is my job, and all jobs have a certain level of undesirable? Shouldn’t I be happy that Ellen is now two and can do a few (teeeeeennnny) things on her own? Shouldn’t I allow myself to do the bare minimum to reduce stress (trust me, I do)?

Shirking Quality Time in Futile Attempt for Me Time:

And, after needs are met, they want quality parental time. They love me, so they want to play with me all day long. And I love them too. But I hate playing. I just really dislike playing. I don’t want to read that book again. I don’t want to bounce toys up and down while making pretend conversations in play voices. I don’t want to spin. I don’t want to play tea. I just want to sit and read my book. Or I want to craft and adult craft that requires more than just crayons. Or I want to run out of the house on a quick errand without bundling up everyone and turning it into an all day affair.

So, what do I do instead? I hit the Internet because I can pop in for a few minutes here and there whenever I get the chance – and boy do I make sure I get the chance. All. Day. Long. Sometimes I think about giving it all up. Letting the blog fall flat. But, I can’t stand the thought of losing contact with some of the wonderful people I have met. And, I wonder how other moms make it work: the Simchas, the Jens, all of them.

And what about other moms? I wonder what the breakdown of their days look like. It’s as if I want to know how much time they spend doing all of their motherly things so I know just how much I should be doing as well.

Anger and Frustration at Constant Neediness:

And, when I can’t get that little bit of time that I want to myself, I get frustrated. Then the kids take a cue from me and get whiny and needier. Then the cycle spins out of control and people are crying and in time out, and I am left with…

Feeling Guilty About the Day:

I look back on the day I just spent with the most precious people in the world to me, and I feel like I failed to appreciate them and give them the day they deserve. I don’t think they deserve constant attention and entertainment. I don’t think they deserve a day without lessons learned. I don’t think they deserve a day without challenges. But, I do think they deserve a day with a parent who is present and invested in them. A parent who does things with intention rather than in hopes of survival. Most nights when they are finalllllllly sleeping, I have this thought: God forbid something were to happen to them tonight, would I regret anything? And, the answer is usually yes. I should have done more.

–

Mike asked if I want to go back to work after I told him I thought the kids might be better off being raised by someone else. Honestly, I don’t want to go back to work. I want to be good at the job I already have, and I want to be good at it in a way that doesn’t feel like a horrible punishment to me each day. I want to get through the day without copious amounts of TV and Internet usage just so I can zone out and not hear crying and constant whining. I want to know that my kids are going to turn out alright and I am not giving them a future complex that leads them to constantly search for the love, attention and affection that their mother could not provide.

I know that a night out by myself or an hour to veg when Mike gets home would do wonders. I’m aware. But, it seems like even after I have that, I slip back into the cycle the very next day. Do I need to grow up and realize that this isn’t my life anymore? Do I need to accept a new normal and get happy about it? Do I need to give more quality time to my kids?

Am I being dramatic? I don’t know. It doesn’t seem like it to me. But, I want to open it up to you now. I’ve been honest with how I feel. Now be honest with me. What are your thoughts? What are your words of wisdom? What can I do to make this better?

I am done. So done.

December 18, 2013 By Jenna 14 Comments

It seemed like it was going to start off alright. Both kids let me shower in relative peace this morning, and we all slept until 7:45. Not too shabby.

And then everything went down faster than prune juice through a 2yo.

“Let’s bake cookies!” I said. “It will be fun!” I said. So I spent a whole hour wrestling two children into clean diapers and kind of clean clothes so we could march down into the kitchen for breakfast and baking. And that’s when I realized that we never cleaned the kitchen from dinner last night due to some unfortunate and unplanned events (ahem, Mike). No problem. I would just clean the kitchen until it didn’t really come close to sparkling, and then get the goods out to bake.

But, you know, babies and stuff. Sam wanted to eat and then Sam wanted to sleep. And since he can’t do either of those things without me these days, the joy fell solely upon me.

THEN, it was time to bake. So I got all of the ingreeds. Ingreeds that I had sent two different people to the store for over the past week because I kept running out of things I needed. (Yeah, I tried to bake these cookies on two other occasions this week. Failasaurus.) And what do I find? We are out of peppermint. Just an empty bottle of it because that makes sense that I would put an empty bottle back in the cupboard.

What I thought I would do next was take the kids to the store because I hate myself. Top off Sam. Lay him down so he can scream while I get Ellen’s socksbootscoathatglovesscarf on. Pick up Sam and get his socksbootscoathatglovesscarf on. I love putting socksbootscoathatglovesscarf because I just need to take most of it off once I get them in their car seats. That’s fun. Ok, Sam is dressed, and WHAT THE? Ellen has taken EVERYTHING off. I hate my life.

Ellen was finally and sufficiently yelled at and redressed, so I piled them in the car one trip at a time because dragging two through two feet of snow is not my idea of keeping it cool.

The entire way there, Ellen yelled, “Mom! Look at me!” which, you know, I can’t. So, when we got to the overflowing Meijer parking lot, I turned to look to see that she had taken off her boots and socks. Hardy har.

Get kids in store. I just need peppermint, but I might as well pick up a few things for pies that I need to make this weekend. We grab all of the goods with ease until we hit up the last isle. I am calculating measurements and very complicated mathy things in my head while Ellen yells,

“Mom! Mom! Mom! Moooooooooommmmmmm!”

“What?”

“I’m going to call you Vagina now!”

“Okay.”

I swung by the wine isle for an impulse buy of a bottle of the cheapest I could find because anything will do the trick.

So, we pay, and get out mostly intact. The total damage only came to $40, two hours, two lost but then found hats and one boot dropped twice crisis.

Now we are back at home, and the only solace I could find was to either eat my weight in baking chocolate or hash this out for you. This option seemed easier on my thighs.

And, I will just leave you with all of that. I haven’t baked the cookies yet, but I have the damn peppermint. I might get to it later, but right now, Ellen is emptying a box of tissues while Sam is eating an orange crayon.

It’s the price I pay for sanity?

Jenna Says, She’s Goin’ Away to Spain

November 12, 2013 By Jenna 5 Comments

Jenna knew she wasn’t going to make it home that night. She had decided to make a day trip out to her parents’ house to visit, get a haircut, maybe pawn off the children. But, she started to get The Sickness. The one that her kids have dramatically been suffering from for tedious minute after tedious minute for days upon freaking days. So, when 6:30 rolled around and she found herself falling asleep in her dad’s favorite tv-watchin’ spot while soothing a sore throat, she knew it was all over. That hour drive back to her house was not happening.

She called Mike and let him know that he had the all clear to play video games at full volume without his old-lady complaining about the racket. He acted very disappointed, bless his heart. Then, Jenna decided to call it a night so she could get ahead of this virus. And God laughed a hearty laugh.

First Ellen went to bed, and things were looking up. The two-year-old didn’t put up a fight, and Jenna thought she might get a solid sleep in. But Sam. Oh Sam. Sam had never been sick before. He is new to this world, and to him, the sniffles are suitable cause for watching the world burn.

Jenna tried it all: sit down, stand up, rock, nurse, white noise, Tylenol, lay on ground, lay on bed, lay in carseat, lay in crib, lay the frack down. But, nothing. It wasn’t until Sam was sufficiently cried out that Jenna was able to climb in bed. It was midnight, and she was ready to sleep.

No sooner did she climb under the covers did Sam pop back up. And, of course, since Jenna is sometimes a good mom, she popped back up with the little cherub. They played this game until two in the morning, and the mother and son finally dreamed a dream.

What seemed like 15 minutes later (and, if we’re not being dramatic – which we are – was actually two hours later), Jenna heard a knock at her childhood bedroom door. It was her mom, and she was bearing a gift. It was Ellen, awake and ready to play. “I can’t do this anymore. She is crazy,” Jenna’s mom said. And, with no energy to respond, Jenna grunted and took the toddler into her bed.

Ellen chatted and danced and thrashed and jumped until Jenna finally said, “Lay down and close your eyes or I will put you in the Pack-n-Play all by yourself for the rest of the night.” Eyes closed. Toddler asleep. “Nothing a little threat can’t fix,” she thought.

Then, because life is not fair, Sam decided it was time to feast. He awoke with crocodile tears and the screeches of a thousand owls, and he woke his sister up along with him. This hilarious back and forth went on for another hour or so until the three were able to coordinate their Zzzs.

If the dear reader is calculating things, the reader would know that it was soon time to wake for the day. All Jenna wanted to do was get back home and change into clean clothes, which she was finally able to do…at three in the afternoon.

Now, there is something about carseats that when a child is inserted, said child hates life and will vocalize those feelings. Jenna’s children are no different. So, she headed over to Tim Horton’s for a hot chocolate to sip while her children wrote the lyrics to all the screamo songs. Filled up on chocolate and sugar, she could surely handle this ride.

Just as she thought, the kids finally cried themselves into a nap, and Jenna was finally able to crank up the Ja Rule like a d-d-d-d-drummer chick.

Things were no better once she got home, but Jenna knew that Mike would be home on time that night and there was one glass of chardonnay left in the fridge. And, despite their wicked bad attitudes, she knew her kids were pretty damn cute. Good thing.

Jenna is joining Kelly who also likes to write in third person.