Chomping at the bit, were you? Well, here it is.
I have to start off by saying that with both of my kids, the pregnancy, labor and delivery were relatively easy compared to many stories I have heard, and for that I am eternally grateful. Seriously. I’ve heard so many crazy stories, and I basically get pregnant and have a baby. End of story. But, because I love you, I will do my best to make this readable at the very least and charming if you’re being kind.
Ellen comes into our bed – something she does very rarely these days (thank you thank you thank you). But, she has a new ninja move she is pulling. It’s called the sit up in your sleep and throw yourself off the side of the bed move. And, she was about to pull it. Luckily, I woke up and grabbed her ankles before she could go skydiving. Cue water. Gush.
I am in the bathroom deciding if I had peed my pants of if my water actually broke. It isn’t stopping. It broke. At this point, my adrenaline kicks in and I can’t stop shaking. Ellen’s birth was a hard and painful one, so I am freaking out that Sam’s is going to be similar.
“Mike. Wake up. My water broke.”
“You probably peed your pants.” Rolls over.
My parents, being the wonderful people they are, drove up to our house to take care of Ellen who has decided she is not going back to sleep because something fun is clearly happening.
We arrive at the hospital, and I am still not contracting. I am worried that this is going to take a long, long time. Nurse tells me to try and get some sleep (not going to happen), and leaves Mike and me to play the waiting game.
5:00 am – 9:00 am
We set a world record for consecutive times watching SportCenter as it is the only thing on TV.
Still not contracting, so the nurse starts me on petocin. I start to shake again because I have a feeling this is going to suck.
They have been cranking the petocin, and I am actually starting to have contractions that I can’t talk through. The millisecond the happens, I ring for drugs. I am not playing the hero this time. Besides, I found out that there is no trophy at the end. Darn.
Dr. comes in to give me the epidural. It has taken me longer to get a large fry at a drive thru. I am pleased beyond all measure. More importantly, I cannot feel a thing, and I sleep.
Nurse checks me. Fully dilated. I practice pushing, and she likes it. She calls the doctor and tells him I’m ready. I am in disbelief as active labor with Ellen was no short of 22 freaking hours. Best part? I can still feel my contractions a bit, so they leave the drugs on.
The pushing process was the exact opposite of my experience with Ellen. Sam’s 1. was not painful 2. I was energized 3. Mike didn’t have to hold me up 4. it was quick (15 minutes and 5 pushes, y’all) 5. I was aware and feeling good enough that I was actually joking with Mike and the doc.
May 15, 2013, 3:25 pm
Sam Bone was born with no complications for any parties involved. Thanks, kid. The doctor handed Mike the scissors to cut the cord – you know, in true Hollywood style. Mike shakes his head “no” for some reason. Doc hands scissors to me, and I get to do the deed.
8 lbs 7 oz
19.5 in long
12 days early (How big would he have been if he went 40 weeks???)
Like I said, I am so incredibly grateful that my pregnancies and L&Ds are pretty uneventful. Maybe it doesn’t make for good blog fodder, but I’ll take the mundane any day of the week. Ellen’s story was a bit more traumatizing for me due to sheer exhaustion, so if you’re looking for a bit more drama, you can check that one out.
After Ellen, I had no intentions of ever doing that again. Ever. After Sam, I would honestly do that multiple multiple more times – if it wasn’t for the nine months of cooking the babe that I loathe oh so much. But really. Sam’s birth? It was like a birth miracle (because, you know, it’s not already a miracle). It was truly awesome – a lot like him.